And this is a great tool, especially if like me, you have family and friends who live very far away from you and you cannot see them face to face that often.
But I noticed a considerable downside to this. It seems that because we are almost constantly connected to Facebook via our phones, tablets, and other devices and we interact with those people daily often by liking their content, commenting on what they post, and occasionally exchanging a few words by a Facebook chat, that it gives us an illusion of continuing relationship with them and it often begins to replace other more comprehensive forms of communication with the people we care about.
It is only an illusion, because liking someone's content, commenting on their photos, and occasionally exchanging few words cannot really maintain real relationships. Those activities DO NOT equal having a real conversation with them.
Now, I get the fact that not everyone on your friends list is your real friend and when you have several hundred people there, you really cannot maintain real relationships with them all, so it will be natural that you will have this superficial relationships with most of them, but what is most disturbing to me is the fact that Facebook can turn even those real close relationships we used to enjoy with friends and even family to the very superficial relationships we have with acquaintances and strangers.
Personally, I consciously try to prevent this from happening with my close relationships, but I sadly discovered that others do not always make the effort and because of that many of my close relationships became superficial soon after those friends and family joined me on Facebook.
I used to talk on the phone with them or face to face in person, or via Skype regularly, which allowed us to really share our life experiences with one another. Now with most of them it is only short Facebook messages and likes. They really don't know what is happening in my life beyond what I share on Facebook ( which is very little) , and I don't know what is really happening in their lives. But the sad thing is that when I try to find out, I get only short polite and very concise answers, and it is only me who is making the effort. If I don't write to them asking how they are doing, they will not write or talk to me for years on end. This is NOT a relationship anymore. Real relationships go both ways, not just one, and real relationships demand that we make time for real conversations.
I am very thankful for those few friends and family who do make time to talk to me, and I do anything possible to make time for them, but there were quite a few relationships that were important to me that Facebook killed.
Let's not allow this to happen, especially if we are Christians. You know, liking things on Facebook or sitting in the same Church building for an hour every Sunday is not really fellowship. The Lord Jesus warned us of this when He predicted that in the end times "the love of many will grow cold" because of the lawlessness. The greatest law binding us together is the Law of love. When we allow the relationships with people we care about to become superficial, our love for them grows cold and we begin to practice lawlessness.
Evaluate the relationships you have today and make sure that they do not become superficial. make it a point to have real conversations with people you care about, and if your relationships became superficial, do whatever in your power to change that.
An update: In 2020, I finally left Facebook for good. Before cancelling my account, I sent private messages to people I wanted to keep in touch with and told them the ways, we can stay in contact after I leave. Only a few responded. Some did not even acknowledge my message, but kept mindlessly sending me links. It really hurt, but at least now I know who my real friends are and I am happier for it. Facebook is a friendship killer. I don't miss it at all.
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